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| #0000089 |
The worst thing I've ever done is...
I found out my girlfriend was cheating on me, so before I dumped her I put her toothbrush up my bum. HAH.
But the best thing I've ever done is...
Told her two days later. HAHAHAHAHA! | 
20
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| #0000111 |
The worst thing I've ever done is...
I've been faking a mental illness since I was 14, at first just so i could get a girl to like me but I won't lie, the benefit payments make life a lot easier. It's come back to bite me on the ass though as I'm now unable to get many of the public service jobs I want due to my 'condition'. I've been telling people I'm fine for years now, but no one believes me. I pretend to take my medication because taking it just gives me headaches, but I've now come to realise I actually am mentally ill just in a different area and they're all like "We won't give you any more medication, the ones you're taking ought to cover it." And now that we're not 14 anymore, the illness doesn't impress cute goth girls, they've all grown into regular women and think I'm a loony. But still, I'm basically lying to everyone I care about, plus the government, because I just say I've gotten better, rather than saying I was fine to begin with.
But the best thing I've ever done is...
I stay away from almost all social contact, particularly that of a meaningful nature, so I can never again infect those around me with my particular brand of self-obsessed moralising and penchant for lying wildly about myself. To this end I live alone, have no friends, and soon my girlfriend will break up with me, which is a good thing - much as it hurts to let her go - because I'm a massive tool who just covers it up and acts like a loving boyfriend, as opposed to someone she meets who doesn't have to cover things up. It's not like I cheat on her - or ever would - you literally couldn't tell me apart from a regular loving boyfriend unless you saw just how often I masturbate. But I know that inside I'm this emotionally dead monster, so I'll let her go. So i guess the best thing I've ever done is try my damndest not to get close to people. 'Cause I'm an asshole, really. |
-8
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| #0000108 |
The worst thing I've ever done is...
I've cheated on every single person I've been out with. I've never felt guilty, just pissed off when I was caught. I've dated someone to get closer to his best friend, I've been late for an anniversay dinner because I was sleeping with my ex, and I got my job as a barmaid to meet men. I am currently cheating on my partner with 4 of the customers from the pub, one of his best friends, and my ex-boyfriend.
But the best thing I've ever done is...
I do voluntary work in my spare time, both at a residential home and a nursery. I saved a child's life at the nursery 2 weeks ago, and visited her in hospital when her parents were unable to. |
-24
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| #0000061 |
The worst thing I've ever done is...
I don't know if this makes me a bastard or a legend but I once had sex with my girlfriend's mother. I don't think this would have made me a sinner but then I went and bragged about it and no longer have a girlfriend. :(
But the best thing I've ever done is...
I give £2 a month to the sad looking kid on TV. |
-21
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| #0000084 |
The worst thing I've ever done is...
I logged into my cheating ex's personal email account and fiddled with the junk filters so that all the really important emails got deleted instead of going into the inbox. Also I felt happy about doing it and not remotely guilty.
But the best thing I've ever done is...
I once saved five abandoned newborn kittens and raised them until they were old enough to go to new homes. Which doesn't sound like much but they would have died in the wild. |
60
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| #0000113 |
The worst thing I've ever done is...
I once killed a fox with a tire iron. I had shot it with a rifle, and it was dying so I wanted to finish it off quick, and carried a tire iron for this purpose. But it didn't kill it immediately, or at least it went into spasms and stuff, so I hit it like seven times. That was pretty harsh. Sometimes I get scared because even though there's no reason to belive killing that fox gave me an erection, I can't remember if I had one or not. I mean I probably didn't, but you never know.
But the best thing I've ever done is...
One time some little gay guys in a bar were getting hassle off this huge football playing meathead - huge as in 6 foot 8 (I know 'cause he was in the papers a few months later because he raped some girl) - and I stepped in and told him to calm down and leave. I'm like 5 foot 6. He did calm down and leave, I think with hindsight because he recognised me as his friend's son, but I had no idea who he was at the time. But it worked, and I saved the day, and one of the gays tried to buy me a drink but I turned him down because a hero doesn't accept payment. |
-6
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| #0000083 |
The worst thing I've ever done is...
Stole a car (a BMW 325i) and then got chased by the police, then burnt the car out and got away.
But the best thing I've ever done is...
Buy my wife flowers |
-25
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| #0000099 |
The worst thing I've ever done is...
When I was younger than 13, I used to beat up my brother really badly. Our mom was very abusive (chased us around with a buther knife, choked my brother half half unconscious, beat us weekly) so I guess that's why I was so angry and took it out on him, but it was still wrong.
He forgave me once we became adults (said it was kids stuff) but I don't feel proud for doing it. I'm still troubled by violent thoughts occasionally, but don't and never will act on them.
But the best thing I've ever done is...
I talked an Iraq war vet out of suicide and stayed up all night in his room, once he finally passed out drunk on the bed, to make certain he didn't throw himself out the window like he wanted to.
Earlier that night, I had also talked the cops out of arresting him so his career didn't get ruined. He has a family and 2 kids and I didn't want his and their lives to be ruined.
His wife called to thank me, he got promoted, stopped drinking, and got help afterwards. |
29
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| #0000060 |
The worst thing I've ever done is...
I was living abroad by myself a few years ago and going out with a girl there. The relationship was kind of going downhill and I wanted to call it off but with the holiday festivities nearly upon us I was very much looking forward to a lovely Christmas dinner, and perhaps even a pressie or two. So I stayed with her over Christmas and had a brilliant Christmas dinner with her family, some presents from them too, and then split up with her the day after Boxing Day having had my fill of holiday cheer.
But the best thing I've ever done is...
I worked at a mall once and our stock-room was down beneath the actual shops in the underground parking bit below. Anyway, I was dossing about killing time round the stock room when an elderly gent nearby collapsed. Only me and his wife were around and she was trying to call an ambulance on her phone but she mustn't have realised that underneath all the concrete there was no phone reception. So, impelled to help, I whizzed up four storeys and grabbed some paramedic type bloke who managed to keep the old boy going until the ambulance turned up. Then before leaving the chaps driving the ambulance told me I had probably saved the guy's life with my quick response. |
32
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| #0000087 |
The worst thing I've ever done is...
I could have done a lot worse than this, it's not actually bad in the grand scale of things. I started 2timin my gf of 3 yrs as soon as I went away to college, every time I went home to see her I'd tell my new girl I was going to see friends/family and she believed me and I was getting all the sex I wanted. Eventually I told the new one I was jus usin her for sex and broke up with her and my old gf found out but she stayed with me anyway, result.
But the best thing I've ever done is...
I'm not saying I'm Mother Theresa or anything but I live my life like a good person, I buy the Big Issue and I compliment girls even when they look like crap, I'm always loyal to my friends and I just try to chill out and have a good time. |
-38
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